I am representing a refined and elegant client who was formerly a medical doctor in Hong Kong. She is dignified, strong, tenacious, brilliant, feisty and scrappy all at once. As I listened to fascinating tales about her studies, her jobs and her research, I couldn't help but think that she lived a worthwhile life. Yet, now as she is slowly aging . . . she has become so vulnerable. Without family in the United States, she is reliant on “friends” and “acquaintances” to help her.
I met her by sheer serendipity. I was noncommittal when I was initially contacted to help Ms. Pearl (a fitting but purely fictitious name). Several emails later and a frantic telephone call, I learned that Ms. Pearl threw a tantrum and refused help. I recalled teasing, “Great . . . another difficult elderly woman.” So I agreed to touch base with her. I called Ms. Pearl twice and twice she grilled me,”Do you have enough experience? I can find help somewhere else.” I retorted, "Of course! I have many years of experience as a lawyer, that's why they asked me to meet you." She finally agreed to an appointment.
I went to visit Ms. Pearl because she had mobility issues. Even when I arrived, she said behind the door, “I don’t need your help. There are lots of places where I can get a lawyer.” I knocked again, and when she opened the door, I gave her my brightest smile and handed fresh baked Asian pastries to her.
At last, she led me into her apartment. Once I started talking to Ms. Pearl, her defenses began to drop one by one. She showed me all of her paperwork and I couldn’t help but feel deep anguish over her circumstances. She was being evicted but that was just scratching the surface of her problems. There were many layers that created more questions than answers. As I began piecing together her situation, she enchanted me with stories of her youth and accomplishments. I realized that her problems were far more complicated than what I was asked to do. I also knew that if I negotiated a settlement for her, I would dishonor her very being. I told her I needed to conduct more research and I would return in a few days.
I was reprimanded by at least three people that I was “once again” helping someone for free when I am struggling financially. Yet I knew that if I didn’t help her . . . no one else was available. I also knew that if I didn’t help her, an enormous puzzle would not be solved. I tend to listen to my heart because I believe it is the core, the essence of my being. I kept thinking that the reason I started my own practice was to “speak for those who could not”. My heart was compelled to make time for Ms. Pearl.
Every pearl is unique. Unlike other jewels, they don’t arise from the depths of the earth but from the sea. Pearls do not require special cutting or polishing to maximize their beauty. To me, she is “Ms. Pearl” because her beauty, inside and outside, should be treated with integrity and respect even as she begins to age.
