Mindfulness has been defined in many ways: (1) to pay attention on purpose, in the present moment, without judgment or (2) keeping your attention alive in the present moment. (Niemiec, Ryan M., Psy. D., 3 Definitions of Mindfulness That Might Surprise You, Psychology Today, Nov. 1, 2017.)

During the litigation journey, our clients are in “crisis” mode. It is easy to panic and allow our emotions to control our reactions. We encourage mindfulness because when we look into ourselves without judgment that is where we find our hidden triggers. Everyday life is fast-paced and the threat of eviction creates additional stress. It is common to react to situations and get caught up in stress. We get trapped in past problems with the landlord or become overwhelmed by anxiety about the future. Mindfulness helps us achieve a relaxed, awareness of our thoughts and feelings. We can train ourselves to be aware when our thoughts are taking over and realize that thoughts are “mental events” that do not have control over us. Being mindful allows us to control and manage a lawsuit.

Earlier this year, my mom was hospitalized and I was confronted with questions about my own health. How my lack of care would someday affect my children and family. I learned that mindfulness is also a conscious decision to “live well” in this very moment.

In “How to be Well”, Frank Lipman, M.D. with Amely Greeven designed a circular system presenting six rings of Good Medicine:

How to Eat (Mastering the Building Blocks of Life-Food)

How to Sleep (Reprioritizing and Restoring a Fundamental Need)

How to Move (Ensuring the Body Moves the Way Nature Intended)

How to Protect (Mitigating and Preventing the Assault of Toxins)

How to Unwind (Switching Off to Rest Mentally and Physiologically)

How to Connect (Awakening and Enhancing a Sense of Belonging)

Before my mom’s illness, I was living life on auto-pilot. I didn’t make mindful decisions about what I was eating. I just grabbed what was convenient or fast, not necessarily what was best for my body. I wasn’t making conscious decisions about the long term health impact of decisions made on “auto-pilot”.

I began to make small conscious changes. To me, being mindful is realizing the choices I make in what I eat and drink, when I sleep, if I exercise, how I manage my workload and how I connect with people alters my overall health and well-being.

Every experience influences our lives.  Our bodies process everything we encounter - physically, mentally and emotionally. So each experience becomes a part of us.

Negative experiences are processed differently from positive experiences.  If we overload our systems with negative input, our minds, bodies and emotional well-being goes out of balance. Negative input is detrimental and toxic.  It causes stress, conflict, pressure and insecurity in our souls.

If we replace negative input with positive input, these experiences are processed into our overall well-being, energy level and health. The best input are experiences that make us feel rejuvenated physically and mentally.  It can be a peaceful walk beside the ocean, the shared laughter between friends, or an open and honest conversation.  Positive input stimulates us on every level making it much easier for our bodies to process.

When we lift heaviness from our bodies and lives, and replace it with positive input, we become happier. This is a form of self-care. Experiences serve as fuel for our bodies.  If we allow negative experiences to dominate our lives, our bodies will feel pressure, sadness, hunger and want.  We are responsible for the energy that we allow into our lives.  When  positivity permeates, we magnify light and shine brilliantly.

Self-care is the most loving act you can do for yourself during this incredibly stressful time.  When you replace negativity with gratitude, love, compassion and peacefulness, your outlook becomes brighter and every  person you encounter is affected positively.  

Find time to have fun, even during the long and protracted litigation process. Make a list of all the things that make you happy, then do those things. Throughout the litigation period, replace negative input with positivity because it impacts your outlook.

Our clients write in a journal because this process allows them to become more self-aware.  A journal helps keep track of the landlord's wrongdoing and documents the length and frequency of the invasive acts.  It allows you to step back and record the events while assessing your own reactions and acknowledge how the harassment is affecting you internally.  

Keeping a journal also enables our clients to communicate with us.  We recommend that you keep a journal entry for each interaction with the landlord.  An entry lists the date and time of the confrontation, recounts what happened, who was there and narrates what was said between the parties. It is a snapshot of the sights, sounds, smells, concerns, insights, doubts, fears, critical questions and issues that are important to you.

The time that you are “journaling” will help you to reflect on what you've seen, felt and experienced.  Writing in a journal allows you to unpeel all of the external layers and find the truth within.  Yet being honest takes time.  The first few entries will seem awkward, but once you regularly record your feelings, you will find a pattern in your behavior.  The journal forces you to evaluate what triggers your strong reactions.  Some actions may remind you of a hurtful past event and it will help you figure out what troubles or unnerves you.  It often provides clarity about your desired outcome from the lawsuit. 

We live in a world where we are “overworked, overstressed, overfed and overstimulated”. Lauren Roxburgh

Dealing with landlords who continue to violate your rights can create chronic stress. Meditation is the most effective stress management technique. (Hoff, Nick. Stress-Free for Good. 2019) There are numerous benefits of meditation which are backed by science: it reduces stress, controls anxiety, promotes emotional health, enhances self-awareness, lengthens attention span and improves sleep. (Thorpe, Matthew, MD, Ph.D, 12 Science-Based Benefits of Meditation, Heathline, July 5, 2017.)

Katie Stone explains, “Its main purpose . . . is to ‘reset’ your mind, so you can leave all the emotional baggage behind. It brings you back to the present, slows you down, focuses you.” - Morning Rituals, Increase Your Productivity, Success & Happiness.

Matt Valentine of buddhaimonia.com uses a simple “Tea Meditation” practice. (https://buddhaimonia.com/blog/find-peace-destress-with-tea-meditation.) When he makes tea, he puts all his attention on every step of the process. He savors every sip of the tea without letting any worries or anxieties disturb him.

When I experience stress, my mind swirls with competing thoughts. I’ve learned to become conscious of each worry as I pray. (https://www.womansday.com/life/inspirational-stories/g29613781/prayers-for-anxiety/)

The links lead to meditation techniques and prayers that you can try. We encourage our clients to develop their own meditation practice to help cope.